English vs Manglish

Who says our English is bad. Just see below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-point, effective etc. The English did invent the English Language, but they cannot use it economically when communicating their intentions. Compare these phrases that Malaysians and Britons use to say the same thing: So, why make things so confusing and waste of money when you are and a long distance call.

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hallo, u call me aaa?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY.
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: Skew's me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians:No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?

WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Doe-waaaan!

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please! lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shaddap lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.
Malaysians: Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: Wat happen Why like dat????ADUI!!! (jumping to conclusion)

WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you.
Malaysians: Hoi!!!u pig ar like dat also doe no how to do!!!!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me
Malaysians: Celaka u/L****UI/c***i la/p**i mak/punya ma!!!

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Ever Heard Darkie?

Have you ever used Darkie to brush your teeth? Some of you might never heard of that brand because the name was already changed to Darlie when you're born. As I read in Wikipedia, the name was officially changed from Darkie to Darlie in 1985. In 1985 I was 2 years old but I really feels like I did use Darkie as late as 1988 when I was old enough to understand and remember lots of things. I could still remember some portion of the tv commercial about the name change.

Darlie/Darkie was originated from Taiwan and very popular in Asian countries. The name Darkie was used perhaps to reflect the nice teeth of black people. The name was changed to Darlie to avoid being a racist brand and to have good market in English-speaking market.

In Malay language the word Darkie sound as same as "daki" that means the body stain caused by dirt and sweat. In my hometown and maybe anywhere in Malaysia, people make jokes to kids that the toothpaste contain "daki" and sales of the toothpaste get better after the name change.

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Tidor la oy!!

Dari kul 6 ptg smlm aku tak tdo lg sbb smlm aku dh tdo byk so aku xleh tdo mlm. Bila aktiviti siang dh transfer kt malam kena la aku wat semua time malam. Saje aku tak tdo siang ari ni sbb mlm ni aku nk tdo awal. Record bln ni aku tdo awal ari ni. ok la.. nak tdo.. dah letih sgt ni. harap2 esok aku dah tak nocturnal lg.

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Snatch

Tuesday, April 1st, 2008, 6.45 pm (estimated)
Location: Section 7, Shah Alam (Near the Proton Showroom)

I've witnessed a woman being snatched a handbag while she was eating at a restaurant. I was also eating at the same restaurant but was too far to do something about it. The woman in the age of around 40+, put her handbag on the table she was dining when a man came from the back and snatched the bag before escaping with his teammate. While one of the snatcher try to steal the bag, another was in standby on a motorcycle with running engine to help for their escape.

Similar story quite a year ago. This time at Bukit Mertajam, Penang. I was having dinner with friends when suddenly a woman riding motorcycle was snatched by two guys also on motorcycle. This time i think the snatchers only manage to grab the raincoats of the woman but still the woman unable to maintain control of her bike and felt. She sustain only minor injuries.

*Ladies out there: CAREFUL

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A fishing story

A man gone fishing alone on a boat.. after a while, he caught a big fish.. with sweating effort, the fish finally reached his hands.. somehow, while trying to free the fish from the hook.. a strong wave hits his boat and suddenly the fish escaped. The water was so clear that he could see the same fish was actually lying on the bottom of the river bleeding caused by the hook. Now the man is in deep thought of either to try catching the same fish or move to other places.

ok.. that's metaphoric.. if you could understand..

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